Maybe Means No

When product managers say “Maybe” they generally mean “No.” Which do you prefer as a customer: a convenient lie or the truth?

I do not intend to wax philosophical on the nature of the truth. What I contend is that saying “Maybe” when you really mean “No” is deceit. White lies are still lies. It is how shows such as American/Pop Idol are filled with people who believe they sing like angels but sound as if they are skinning cats. Their families and friends prefer not to pop the bubbles of their dreams, so instead of being honest, they allow their loved ones to be embarrassed in front of a large audience on television. Most people can tell the difference between someone who can sing beautifully and others who cannot carry a tune in a bucket. A moment of honesty may prevent a lifetime of ridicule. That moment may be uncomfortable, but it is a balm compared to becoming the butt of the public’s jokes.

Customer agency

Anyway, let’s get back to the world of product management. I am an advocate for the product manager as the pope of nope. Saying “No” can feel awkward. Hearing “No” can be rough. But I prefer honesty, both as a product manager and customer.

If product managers do not divulge the whole truth as in “Maybe but not bloody likely,” it is lying by omission. What is worse is that it removes the customer’s agency. If I, as a customer, hear that a certain feature is not going to be implemented, I may and probably will be annoyed, but I have a choice: stay and figure out a workaround, or leave for another product, especially when my problem is urgent and important.

It is understandable that product managers do not want to be complicit in churn. But by lying or avoiding hurting my feelings, the product manager is removing my ability to make a choice. I am involuntarily turned into Vladimir and Estragon, waiting for Godot. My problem still has no solution, but I expect it will come some day. Soon. Probably. Hopefully.

What if “Maybe” is really a euphemism for “No”? It is not as if people cannot read between the lines of corporate communications, such as “Leaving to spend more time with their family” (forced to quit), “Streamlining operations” (layoffs), “Market correction” (more layoffs), or even “Rapid unscheduled disassembly” (blew up). After all, euphemisms lose their power with usage and time.

“Hang on,” you may counter, “Saying ‘Maybe’ does not amount to lying!” It just twists the truth ever so slightly. A lie is fine only if you are never found out. With high attrition in tech companies, there is a chance the product manager will leave before such lies are found out. That just kicks the can down the road to the next PM who can either play the same game or be honest with the customer.

What if you do not know whether a specific customer request will be added at some point in the distant future? Why not be honest about that fact and say you do not see it fit in the foreseeable roadmap. That returns agency to the customer.

No is definitive

A counterargument is that “Maybe” matches reality more closely, because “No” is definitive, and no product manager ever knows anything with absolute certainty. You do not want to shut the door unless you have to, especially with customer relations.

While that is true, it is also true of everything else: a “Yes” is only a “Yes, if nothing happens that may cause us to change our minds later on.” Yet, we do not qualify affirmations in such a way. It therefore has little to do with uncertainty and everything with not wanting to hurt people’s feelings, or more aptly: not wanting to look like an abrasive sumbitch.

What is often misunderstood is that refusing to include certain functionality does not mean the customer is not valued. What seems important to one customer may not be relevant to anyone else. What appears important to that single customer may not be worth the development effort.

Saying “No” to a feature does not close the door on the customer; it does not even close a window while leaving the door wide open. It is more akin to erasing a sketch of a balcony or carport: you drop the idea of a feature that never existed anyway. If a customer is desperate for a feature that is not suitable for the product at all, a decent product manager can aid in seeking alternate solutions or workarounds. That does not mean the product manager is responsible for finding a suitable solution though.

The fears of customers leaving for another product because of a singular absent feature are often overblown. Consumers do not even abandon (free) products or services when their trust has been violated repeatedly. Vendor lock-in and network effects are serious barriers to migration. That applies to both B2C and B2B contexts: switching vendors with whom you have had a business relationship tends to be severely disruptive when their products are pervasive within an organization. Customers therefore only switch products or vendors when they have very good reasons: a significant improvement in functionality, not merely an incremental boost, substantial savings, or because they are tired of empty promises.

The whole truth?

What I am not suggesting is that you reveal the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Certain information is privileged. But you can and should be honest without being rude. It is important to be sensitive to cultural differences: what is considered normal in one region may be seen as impolite or even unacceptable somewhere else. What is more, you may have to adapt the delivery mechanism of the message based on whether you are dealing with high-context or low-context cultures. The former favour oral communication, whereas the latter prefer the written word. In fact, attitudes towards white lies differ between high-context and low-context cultures. That said, I do not consider business the right place for such dishonesty, as it denies agency to customers.

A higher power

It gets nasty when customers complain to a higher power and the executives decide to override the product manager’s authority. First, it sets a dangerous precedent that customers can get what they want by going through back channels. If they dislike the next version of the roadmap, they are going to do the same thing again and again.

Second, it undermines the product manager. If executives distrust the PM’s abilities, that is a failure of their leadership to act. What if the PM does not see the entire picture? That is, again, a failure of executives to share crucial information, not a negative reflection of the product manager’s abilities. If a certain customer is essential to the success of a product or even the entire company, that must be made clear to everyone involved. Corporate dysfunction is not a reason to lie to customers. And lying eliminates the customer’s ability to choose.